Friday, May 12, 2017

On My Own, but Not Alone







Dear Friends,

My pastor recommended that I start blogging again, so here I am.
Since my last post, life has taken a dramatic turn. I'm going through a dissolution of marriage after fifteen years. Fortunately, my children's father and I are currently on good terms and co-parenting is going really well. I won't be scrubbing references to him from my social media accounts.

I'm now living at my parents' farm with the children. I'll spare you the details of the last few exhausting months and just say that I think I've reached the final stage of grief: acceptance.

Mom and Dad have 18 bee colonies and no microwave. They have a rotary telephone and no wifi. Life has come full circle for me. I'm back in my old dormer bedroom in a twin sized bed I'm sharing with my five year old daughter. At night I like to open the window and and we listen to spring peepers and rain or whatever's going on in the country in the dark. We cuddle like two birds in a nest. I'm blessed to have all my children near me in a situation that is safe and familiar to us.

I've set up a portable library in my room with wooden crates. Reading is more than a pleasurable pastime right now: it's a life raft for my mind and spirit. Recently I've been tweeting some of my favorite lines from the book I'm reading: The Autobiography of Andrew Carnegie. It's a great book for anyone attempting a fresh start. I've been deeply challenged by Carnegie's optimism and determination.

The children and I are adjusting well to our new community. They love school and I love volunteering there from time to time. Church has become a genuine sanctuary for my weary heart. A few weeks ago I began serving as a liturgist. The congregants were so loving and supportive of my effort, that I found the courage to do it again. I love how connected and generous they are to those in need. I'm learning from their example how to live out my faith in a more authentic way.

Until next time, then.

Adriana



11 comments:

  1. It's lovely to see you blogging again, but I'm so sorry you've had such a tough time. Glad you're reaching a stage of acceptance and you're surrounded by the people you love and your church. I look forward to reading your posts again <3

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    1. o! It's such a treat for me to receive your comment after my long absence. Thank you for your thoughtfulness.

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  2. I have missed seeing your lovely posts! I'm so sorry that things have been difficult and am sending you good thoughts for the future. <3

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    1. You are so kind, Jean. I am glad to finally feel creative urges again. It sure beats lying prostrate in the fetal position in a puddle of tears!

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  3. Adriana, I am so glad to see this post. And I'm glad you have been finding comfort and restoration through your family, books, and church. I look forward to reading more of your reflections whenever you have time to write them down.

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    1. Oh Jeannie. Faithful friend and fairy blogmother. Thank you for your loving kindness and encouragement.

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  4. This is a post full of hope, Adriana. I read it in each line as you talk about your children and parents and church. We continue to pray for you all!

    Tim

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    1. Tim, It means so much to me that you & your wife have taken time to include us in your prayers these last few months. God is good.

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  5. Just wanted to say I'm here and I'm reading. It's good to hear from you. Also: that photo is of your parents' bee colonies? I never would have dreamed THAT is what they look like.

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    1. Thank you for letting me know you're reading. That's always so encouraging. Yes, those are some of the hives. Dad has been collecting new swarms lately. Four colonies are currently residing in swarm traps up in the trees! 🐝

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Blessings,

Adriana